Slideshow for 4/21/09 Photo of the day

There were so many photos from today that I thought I would post them all in a blog sideshow. Hope you enjoy seeing the kids...;o)

Egg Coloring and Hunting

I allowed the kids to color their own eggs for the very FIRST time this year. They had a great time and got very messy. They even enjoyed putting candy in all the plastic eggs for the hunt the next morning. We did the egg coloring the night before Easter...and the neighbor boy; Maddie's fiance (she proposed) went on the hunt with them. LOL.

And the pictures are out of order...The top photo is the last photo and the bottom bottom is the first. ;o) Enjoy!

California here I come...

...right back where I started from...





So, the kids and I will be moving to California when Hubby moves to Iraq in September. ;o)



I have had an offer to live in a friend's motor home in her RV parking at her house...my sister says we can live in her computer room which is open to the rest of the house...and I would be sleeping on a not so comfy futon. Both those options sound good to me, however. I just wanna spend the time with family and not think about drama or stress or sadness. I know I will be sad without my Hubby, but if I had to start life in Texas without him, I think I would be even more sad.



The BAH (housing allowance) will be good for us to save and help pay some bills. And maybe even save some towards buying our dream property. The property Hubby wants probably won't be available next September/October, but there will be something just as nice or nicer I am sure. And if we were meant to have that place, then it will be there waiting for us.





This is the one he really wants...










http://www.realestate.com/Property/18145012-10268-S-FM-1226-Hawley-TX-79525-11158377.aspx



http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/10268-S-Fm-1226_Hawley_TX_79525_1107207246




31.6 acres of property about 20 miles outside of Abilene, TX. We have orders to Dyess AFB, TX in October 2010. It is a 4 bedroom, 2 bath, 2,432 sq ft double wide modular home. It is actually a nice looking place on a bunch of land. It is fenced all the way around with lots of trees. All for only $129,900. I would think if we could talk them down to about $115,000-120,000 then we could get a loan for $150,000-$175,000 and then make some major improvements on the land and buy some much needed furniture. I am tossing the furniture we have before we move.




I think we could get a better loan amount if we take this next year to pay off the bills and save. We are planning on getting a VA loan, so we don't have to save a down payment. But it is based on credit score for the amount and wages vs debt amount for the interest rate. I would like to get as much as possible for the amount of the loan, with the lowest interest rate and then in 5 years or so when our credit is even better, we can refinance.



Hubby wants THIS property and he wants it ASAP. ;o) Poor guy. It is calling to him I guess. I am just thinking about the credit part of it and the monthly mortgage amount. I am also considering that I can't handle 30+ acres without him. What if there is a fire? What do I DO with all that space??




So, here is all the info and we need to make a decision for our future. This decides what school district our kids will grow up in. This is where we will be FOREVER. We will eventually build a nicer, bigger home on this land and many other things. This is it for us.





As a SSGT, he would get $1,073 a month for housing. As a TSGT (if he ends up passsing the test he took in February) he would get $1,205. In California, using my sister or friend's address, he would get $1,688 SSGT and $1,910 for TSGT. Hmmm...the decision should seem very clear and in focus. ::sigh:: (http://www.defensetravel.dod.mil/perdiem/bah.html)



And the more I look at it, the more I want it too. We just weren't very smart with our finances and credit score when we were single and also since we have been married. I am 31, he is 30 and we should be able to buy some land and a nice little house for the family. Is next year our year? Do we need to wait 5 more years till Rob's Mom can give us some money she says she will give us? Then when Rob retires from the AF will we be able to afford the mortgage? When will it be paid off? 30 years?



Maybe I am over thinking or over worrying about all this. But it seems that if I DON'T then no one else will or is even considering anything. Hmmm...



I just need one of these...

I am really wondering what to do. Hubby goes to Iraq this September for a year and I am trying to plan and prepare for where the kids and I will live. I guess I made a mistake by prepping now since Hubby's Mother is upset at me for sharing my ideas with her. Yesterday I brought up the option of spending the year in California, mostly to collect the BAH (housing allowance) and to be closer to my family. Today she isn't speaking to me. She feels like I am kicking her out and trying to get away from her. That is not even close to what was part of my thought process. I even told her a couple times that she is family and I want to make sure she is happy. I know she wants to live with her boyfriend in Arkansas and she may or may not get married to him any time soon. But I think she should have the option of going to him and seeing how it goes. She can make her own decisions and I have thought for awhile that she doesn't really wanna live with us anyways. The kids love her and we love her, but what happens to us? Do I and the kids and MIL move to Texas and make a go of it until October 2010 and get all settled? Do I and the kids and Cowboy go to California and spend time with my family, save some money, and just enjoy being out there for a year? And that leaves MIL to be with the man she loves and not feeling obligated to take care of me and the kids?

I just don't know. It seems like a tough decision and either way I feel like it is too much to weigh and think about. We threw a bunch of stuff on the curb for large item trash day tomorrow. So we are starting to get things organized and thinking about what we want to keep and toss. I just didn't figure in that she would think I am tossing her aside in any way. But I want to do what will be best for my family any way I can. Sometimes being an adult can be tough and tiring. I have a headache. I wanna just go to bed and let someone else make the decision...but I know I can't. Grrr...

Stamp collecting, archery and ovaries...Oh my!

I completed my last pre-screening item for the egg donation process. This morning I went down and got a psychological test and interview completed. Um...it it was rough. I am not gonna lie. It was basically a counseling session. I went to a shrink in other words. I talked about my childhood and my 'worst' life experience. I had to talk about my home life and she asked me if I was in any kinda of an abusive relationship. She asked me if I used drugs or alcohol to cope with my life. I also had to answer if I had ever paid for sex or had anyone pay me for sex. There were a lot of serious questions about my emotional health and life experiences. Then there was a standardized fill in the bubbles with a pencil test. It was over 300 questions and a lot of the same type questions. I had to answer how the questions related to me in four degrees; very true, mainly true, slightly true and not at all true, false. A few questions were:

My favorite hobbies are stamp collecting and archery. (WTH??)

I feel like someone is controlling my thoughts.

Someone is telling me to commit suicide.

I have a hard time keeping my thoughts straight.

So of course most of the questions seemed totally crazy...or were they? ;o)

That was just over two hours of my day and I won't even know if I am going to be compensated or even if it is for a purpose until someone picks my file. What if they want someone more German or less Norwegian? I am being discriminated against in a way. I know people want to make sure that their kid has the qualities that closely match the sperm donor or their background, I totally get that. But I want to be doing this for a reason. Will I be the last one picked for dodgeball? lol.

I feel pretty secure in my relationships and in how I am as a person. I am confident in many areas, but for some reason, sitting in front of a 'shrink' while she asks me personal questions about my life and how it made me feel, makes me uncomfortable. It made me nervous and wondering if what I said would make her write down something that will make the fertility clinic chuck my file in the shredder. It is kinda worse than a job interview. People will see all my info and decide if they want their child to have my characteristics and genetic makeup.

And she made sure to ask me how I would feel if the 'child' decided to contact me. Since I mentioned I was blogging about this experience she made me realize that posting this info for informational purposes might just lead to them lfinding me in 15-20 years or so. And I told her the truth. I wouldn't mind since all we would have in common is a little bit of DNA and I am not that person's 'mother'. Obviously this child will be cared for since people spend lots of money and try this process usually more than once before it works. So, they are wanted by the best situation possible. It makes me feel important to be a part of that process. I hope it works out for someone and IF they choose me, I hope they get enough viable embryos fertilized so they can make their dreams a reality.

So, all in all, it was a situation that I am glad I won't have to relive, but the hard part is coming. If they pick me, I have to give myself needles full of hormones for a few weeks. I may just faint. LOL. Or it will make me stronger. I will keep you all---if you are reading this--informed of the next steps in the process. Now I just sit and wait for news from the clinic. ::crosses fingers::

Here are two pictures of the awesome Ravenel Bridge which I crossed to get into Mount Pleasant via I26 to get to the psychological testing this morning....